The Time is Finally Here

I have had so many emotions while dealing with infertility.  I think for me the disappointment month after month and the patience that is involved is the worse.  I try not to get too hopeful because I feel that everytime I do, something unexpectedly goes wrong.  For those that do read my blog, you know that I have been dealing with a cyst that I developed while on birth control before IVF.  The funniest thing is that my estrogen level was at 571 which is higher than any level I ever achieved during IUI...and the kicker again was the fact that this was while on birth control...when I was supposed to be suppressed.

After being on lupron for two weeks AF decided to arrive.  It was horrible.  I will not get into details about how awful and painful this AF was.  However, at one point I did think I was going to die (don't laugh) and called the on-call doctor in the middle of the night.  He explained this was all probably due to the high estrogen producing cyst that the lupron was causing to collapse.  I decided to not go to the ER and just spend the night in the restroom.  I took the next day off of work because I was so weak and still dealing with the pain.  Enough is enough...I went in for my baseline today instead of Wednesday because I just had to know what was going on and how much time I had left to live.

Expecting the worse possible news today that perhaps our IVF cycle was going to be cancelled and that I was in fact bleeding to death, I trudged my way into the clinic with my double duty diaper on and everything.  I had my favorite ultrasound tech which cheered me up a bit.  She did notice something within my uterine wall but since it was not in my cavity she didn't seem overly concerned (maybe a new fibroid?).  I did in fact ask her if it was a tumor for which she chuckled and said "no" (did I say that I am a bit dramatic).  My cyst had indeed collapsed and went from 28 mm to 8.5mm in a week!  There was no solid answer on why I was having the period from hell, but I figure that as long as I am not dying then I can concentrate on what lies ahead...which happened to be a big fat cupcake for breakfast. Hey, my blood sugar was low!

So anyhoo....
This is the first month where all of my numbers look great! And I am actually not joking around.
Intrafollicular count: 24! Did I mention I have PCOS :)
LH: .92 (might be a little low, but I am on lupron for down-regulation)
FSH: 3.41
Estrogen: 34.8
lining: 5.3 mm

The plan...continue lupron for two more days to shrink the cyst even more and then begin stims 10/9/11.  I can't believe I am this close to having IVF.  I am almost numb.  I have to believe that this will work or that I will at least get enough embies to freeze.  I have to believe because I need something to change in my favor.  I just want this one thing to go my way.